Wednesday, April 29, 2015

How do I stop biting my nails?

One thing basketball star Lebron James and I share, besides world-class athletic ability and millions of dollars in sponsorship revenue, is the frowned-upon habit of biting our nails.

I don't know why Lebron is constantly nibbling on his fingertips, and come to think of it, I have no idea why I do it, either. Or why it's so hard to stop.

Believe me, I've tried. I get the urge to chomp off a big section of nail and then I think myself, "Don't do that. It's disgusting. And it also makes your small hands look even worse. Let your nails grow. Take care of them. Make them look nice."

Then I stare at that tempting nail and I want so badly to bite it. I try to ignore it, but it just taunts me. In the end, I always give in and bite it. Why? Why can't I resist? What's the big attraction?

One time my sister, who for decades has owned a salon and knows about such things, gave me cuticle oil to use. And a little tool to push those cuticles back. I vowed to start taking care of my nails and to stop biting them, and I stuck to this punishing regimen for 17 full minutes before reverting back to my old ways.

At our wedding, Terry and I took a picture of our hands to show off our wedding rings. Her hand comes across in the photo across as slender and pretty, with French-manicured nails. Mine appears to belong to an 11-year-old dwarf who got into a fight with a badger (and lost). It's a study in horrible contrast.

I always figured that eventually I would grow up and start taking care of my nails, but I'm 45 and it has yet to happen. My fingernails are jagged and ugly, with peeling cuticles that appear to have been neglected for several presidential administrations.

So how do I stop this? Has anyone here quit the habit and can tell me how they did it? Was there hot sauce involved? Or electric shocks?

I'll try anything. I'm like the smoker who has gone through nicotine patches, gum and hypnosis with no result. I'm desperate here, people. Help me out.

I'll be tearing my nails to bits as I anxiously await your suggestions



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