GUEST BLOGGER - Mom-bod: Hot or Not? By Lilia Lipps

(EDITOR'S NOTE: This is the first in what I hope is a series of guest blog posts by, well, guests. People who aren't me. This particular one was written by my former co-worker and current/future friend Lilia Lipps. She is as awesome as her name, trust me. Thought you'd enjoy this. And if you would like to post something on the blog, email me at scotttennant@oh.rr.com. Would love to hear from you!)

Hey guys, my name is Lilia Lipps (not a porn star, I swear) and I had the good fortune of working with Scott once upon a time. He and I “get” each other, and that is why I often enjoy reading his blog. When the idea for this particular blog post came to me, I thought hey, this would work well on Scott’s blog. Thanks for indulging me.

As I walked into the bathroom at work the other day, I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror and had a strange thought. “If Todd were to leave me, I’d have a hard time getting a man the way I look right now.”

And then I thought about what type of man I might be able to attract in my current physical state.

Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not reality show-worthy ugly or fat. But, I am carrying some extra baby weight. My “baby” will be 18 months soon.

Anyway, back to the men. For some reason, the cast of Seinfeld is what I’m picturing. Money and fame aside, Jerry, George and Cosmo aren’t exactly aces in the looks department. But I feel like that’s where I’m at right now.

Which sucks because I’m more of a Beckham, McConaughey, Ian Somerhalder kind of girl. Or at least Putty. I could work with Putty.

Then again, you see unattractive men with pretty girls all the time. Like Rod Stewart and any of his three wives. Jay-Z and Beyonce. Borat (Sasha Baron Cohen) and Isla Fisher. For god’s sake, Julia Roberts, Pretty Woman herself, was married to Lyle Lovett. And of course, the ultimate, Paulina Porizkova and Ric Ocasek.

But it usually is the unattractive man who gets an attractive partner. Rarely is the role reversed. The closest example I can think of is Hugh Jackman and his wife Deborra-Lee Furness. And while she doesn’t match up to the perfection that is Hugh (who could?), she’s not exactly a woof.

Maybe I could land the likes of Leonardo DiCaprio. But the dad-bod version. Although even that pasty, doughy version gets Victoria’s Secret models.

And I get it, I am talking about famous men so of course their fame and money can be alluring enough to a beautiful woman that it clouds her vision. The Hollywood version of beer goggles. But this happens with regular guys too. I think it is because men have this innate sense of confidence that lets them believe that just because they’re 5’4”, balding, pasty, a bad dresser and have shitty jobs while living in mom’s basement, they are a gift to us, the females that are lucky enough to cross their path.

So, I either need to start thinking like a man….or stay married to my husband.

And while I have been occasionally accused of the former, I much prefer the latter.

I suppose I could lose weight, put make up on, or dig out my high heels. Meh. Maybe Jerry wouldn’t be so bad. ;)

If you want to read more of my stuff, check out my blogs:

www.1shotatatime.wordpress.com
www.liliawritenow.com