These are the conversations we had before GPS was a thing

ME: "OK, so you're going to want to take 271 South to Chagrin Boulevard."

FRIEND: "I don't want to go north?"

ME: "If you went north, you would drive directly into Lake Erie."

FRIEND: "OK, OK, got it. South. Is that the ramp near Burger King? Or the one down by the car dealership?"

ME: "It's the one that says '271 South.' There will be a sign."

FRIEND: Are you sure?

ME: "Positive. The Ohio Department of Transportation is not trying to confuse you. Anyway, take 271 to Chagrin Boulevard."

FRIEND: "How many exits away is Chagrin Boulevard?"

ME: "How many exits? I don't know, I don't count them."

FRIEND: "I need to know how many exits it is so I don't miss it."

ME: "Just look for the signs that say 'Chagrin Boulevard.'"

FRIEND: "I don't want to miss it."

ME: "Trust me, you won't miss it if you look for the series of big green signs that say 'Chagrin Boulevard.'"

FRIEND (doubtfully): "I don't know..."

ME: "You have my word. You can do this. Once you get off at Chagrin Boulevard, go east."

FRIEND: "Wait, east? Is that left or right?"

ME: "Well, considering you were just going south, I'm going to say that east will be a left turn."

FRIEND (jotting this down on a scrap of lined notebook paper): "Got it. OK, then what?"

ME: "You'll go a mile down Chagrin, maybe two. You'll get to a roundabout."

FRIEND: "I don't know what that is."

ME: "It's a big circle. Just stay to the right, and where there's a sign saying 'Lander Road North,' go that way. The street is called Bryce Road. It will be on your left."

FRIEND: "How far down Lander?"

ME: "I don't know, maybe half a mile? If you get to the big willow tree in front of the horse farm, you've gone  too far. And don't be fooled by Bryn Road, which is before Bryce. You don't want that one. You want Bryce Road."

FRIEND: "How do you spell that?"

ME: "B-R-Y-C-E. The address is 4725. I think it's on the left side of the street, but I'm not sure. All I know is you'll pass a school with a playground and a big statue of a dog."

FRIEND: "Why a dog?"

ME: "I don't know. That's not important. The main thing to remember here is 4725 Bryce Road. Got that?"

FRIEND: "Yeah, I think so. I wish someone would invent a technology that would just tell us how to get anywhere we're going without having to think about it."

ME: "It will never happen."