The official summertime uniform of the Midwest suburban dad

We never got together and formally ratified this (there are, after all, probably a few million of us), but somehow, collectively, many of us non-coastal, suburb-living dads have made a decision.

We have silently agreed that we're all wearing pretty much the same thing to the graduation parties, barbeques, and other soirees to which we and our wives are invited each year in June, July and August.

The designated uniform is this:

• A solid-colored polo shirt (POTENTIAL FANCY VARIATIONS: A short-sleeve button-down with a semi-daring pattern, or perhaps even a polo with multiple shades...scandalous!)
  
  
• Khaki shorts (POTENTIAL FANCY VARIATIONS: None. You'll wear the khaki shorts and like it, though some of the more daring will perhaps opt for darker shades.)
  
  
• Deck shoes with short (hopefully no more than ankle-length, but preferably no-show) socks (POTENTIAL FANCY VARIATIONS: I guess you can wear some nice sneakers, you slob.)

There are exceptions to this, of course, and quite a few of them. Many more dads have real fashion sense than you might realize, but the rest of us are going with the ensemble described above. It works, it's comfortable, and it requires very little forethought.

I do have a few short-sleeve button-downs I'll break out for especially momentous summertime occasions, but for the most part, it's polo-khakis-boat shoes for me, brother.

Dads, if you and I are at the same grad party, and I see you across the room as I'm filling my plate with potato salad and pulled pork, and you're sporting this dad uniform, I will tip my bottled water at you in a gesture of solidarity.

Then I will walk over, discern whether you are a Tool Guy, a Car Guy, or a Sports Guy, and engage you in relevant small talk until it's time for my wife and I to leave.

This is the suburban dad lifestyle. Embrace it.